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Archive for July, 2017

Sunday Summary: Busy Times

He found himself a (stuffed) dog bed

So, on Wednesday I mentioned we hadn’t had internet since I woke up Monday morning. They came out later that morning and fixed it. Apparently the box the inside wire feeds through(I think that’s what he said. Don’t take my word on it) wasn’t sealed right and got water in it. So he put in a new box that seals tighter and all has been good so far(a couple times my phone has lost connection with it, but I’m starting to think that’s an issue with our phones not the internet).

The kids were going to vacation bible school this week. I don’t consider myself an extremely religious person. We go to church most Sundays, I believe what I believe. And if you know me, you probably know I don’t hold a lot of conservative views, so I often feel out of place in this town and particularly the church(though our pastor seems like she’s more open-minded). But, the kids really enjoy going to bible school. And since MiL picks them up to take them in and husband brings them home when it’s over, it meant 3 hours for me to have the house to myself. Except for Thursday. It was the last day, so they put on a special program at the end of the night. So I went in with them so I’d be there for that. Ended up taking a walk around town while they were in there and stopped at McDonald’s for a milk shake. Then, we went and watched them sing.

Saturday there was a Fireman’s Carnival in one of the nearby-ish small towns, and they had a parade. So we went and watched that. Kids got some candy, and I didn’t have an anxiety meltdown, so all’s good. Then, we got dinner and went to get groceries. Got the girl’s cake mix & frosting. And a little tube of wild animals to decorate her cake(she wants a Wild Kratts theme, and that was the only thing I could think to do. I am not creative when it comes to decorating cakes).

Today we’re going to the water park with some friends and their kids(their son is right between our 2 kids & their daughter is a little younger than our son). And they have a new water slide area for the kids. So that should be fun.

Now for how I did this week. I’ll have the final monthly evaluation probably on Wednesday. For now, here’s this:

Writing:

  • Heart of Christmas – 10000 words – 9915/10000 words, 2257 this week
    • No, it was definitely better to pull away now. He’d have to make her see this was for the best. Somehow.
  • Still Burning – 10000 words – 9692/10000 words, 1965 this week
    • His mother’s face cleared. “Oh. So, this is about a girl.”
  • Whatever It Takes – 10000 words – 9703/10000 words, 2276 this week
    • “Two more,” Jayla said. She still hadn’t met Carisa’s eyes, though. “Konner said he’s bringing his new friend.”
      “You mean boyfriend,” Alexa said, the last word drawn out in a singsong voice.
  • High on Loving You – 10000 words – 10173/10000 words, 1120 this week
    • “I’m hungry,” she heard Raina tell her mother. “I want to eat here.”
      “I don’t really care,” Kacy snapped. “We’re leaving. Now.”
      “Can’t I even say hi to Aunt Ken. She’s right over there.”
      “No,” Kacy snapped. “I said we’re going. Come on. And don’t forget your bag.” *I so wanted to punch Kacy while writing this. Poor Raina.
  • By the Gun – 10000 words – 10092/10000 words, 1640 this week
    • Rosalyn sighed and shook her head then started up toward the house. “What?” Carlos yelled after her. “What does that mean?” *Ahh, siblings. 😉
  • Side Projects – 10000 words – 9971/10000 words, 2170 this week
    • Jacob & Matthew – 175 words – The boy frowned at that. As if he was thinking it over. Then, he asked, “Are you going to go away again?” *Matthew didn’t expect to be sentimental over the little brother he barely knows. And my goal on this one is met for the month.
    • Mike & Fadil – 271 words – Mike couldn’t help it, he laughed too. Then, he ran a hand over his hair. “I am sorry. I did not mean to be a bear.” *that’s not quite how Fadil would describe you, Mike. 😉
    • Patrick & Sarah – 138 words – “Where’s your brother?” she asked. Lord, it seemed she was forever asking him that question.
    • Tavin & Haiwee – 213 words – “Haiwee is well,” the softer voice said, a hand on Tavin’s shoulder. “You are not. You must lay still and let [xx] tend to you. Haiwee will want to cut my heart out if you do not get well.”
    • Roman – 142 words – Roman relaxed at that. He squeezed her knee and smiled. “We’ve got a deal then, Tereza.” He just really hoped he’d be able to pull something off and not disappoint her.
    • Dougal & Shae – 281 words – She didn’t want there to be anything, and he knew he couldn’t push it, or he’d lose the chance at anything. Or she’d just kick his ass.
    • Preggers – 221 words – Lyndi shrugged. “Maybe not. But, it isn’t about them. They’ve been making everything since his death about them. Even my grief.” She pressed her lips tight together, as if she wasn’t sure she should have said all that.
    • Sean & Braeden – 250 words – “Shite,” Braeden said, before dropping to his knees beside his brother. “Dad was here?”
    • Hawk – 228 words – “What did he have to say?” I asked. It was usually Devil who was the impatient one, demanding immediate answers, not me.
    • Jared’s Stepfather – 311 words – She nodded then started getting the bread out. She was obviously used to fending for herself when he wasn’t here. And that killed Jared. he spread peanut butter and jelly on the bread for her and while she ate the sandwich, went back to their bedrooms. He wasn’t surprised to find his wrecked. David took any opportunity to mess with his stuff.

Editing:

  • Stained Blood – Beta edits – Chapter 1/26, 0 this month
  • Flames of Renewal – CP edits
  • In the MoonlightRead Through & Revise , Polish– Read through Chapter 32/32. Revised 308/308 notes. 6/50 polished.
  • Hang On – Polish & Submit – 50/50 polished. Submitted.
  • Staring at the SunRead Through, Revise, Polish, & Post to Wattpad – Read through Chapter 10/10. Revised 40/40 notes.

Reading:

  • Listen: 5 books – 8/5, 3 this week
    • The Delphi Effect(Rysa Walker) – Started this Tuesday afternoon. Finished this Sunday morning. Really enjoyed it, but the next book doesn’t come out until October! Patience is not one of my virtues when it comes to books. 😉
    • A Merciful Death(Kendra Elliot) – Started this Sunday morning. Finished it Wednesday evening. Really enjoyed it.
    • A Million Worlds with You(Claudia Gray) – Started this Thursday morning. Finished it Saturday morning. Really enjoyed it and glad she made everything right that seemed to be wrong at the end of book 2. I was worried for a while there near the end.
  • Read: 30 books – 30/30, 8 this week
    • The Three Brooches(Katherine Lowry Logan) – Started this Saturday morning. At 42%
    • The Shadow Hour(Melissa Grey) – Started this Saturday morning. Finished it Sunday night. Really enjoyed this. And the final book in the trilogy came out like 2 weeks ago! Good timing(even though I won’t get it yet, b/c the kindle version is $10.99!)
    • The Magpie Lord(K.J. Charles) – Read this Monday. Really enjoyed it.
    • The Viper(Monica McCarty) – Started this Monday evening. Finished this Tuesday night. Really enjoyed it.
    • Just One Kiss(Susan Mallery) – Started this Wednesday morning. Finished it Wednesday night. Really enjoyed it, though it kept alternating between saying a character was in the army then navy then army again. And I wanted to shout “they aren’t interchangeable”.
    • Hard to Let Go(Laura Kaye) – Started this Thursday morning. Finished it Thursday afternoon. Loved it. Definitely a satisfying end to the series.
    • Truth or Beard(Penny Reid) – Started this Thursday afternoon. Finished it Friday night. Really enjoyed it. There were parts where I seriously laughed out loud.
    • Just Wicked Enough(Lorraine Heath) – Started this Friday night. Finished it Saturday morning. Enjoyed it.
    • At Attention(Annabeth Albert) – Started this late Saturday morning. Finished this Saturday night. Really enjoyed it.
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WeWriWa: “Hole Up”

Welcome back to another visit with the Weekend Writing Warriors, the blog hop for anyone who likes to write. I’m still sharing from Hawk’s story. This week’s snippet picks up right after last week’s. There’s only a few more sentences in this scene, so I’ll jump to the next one next week. For now, here’s this:

If it was possible, Mr. Bentley’s grin widened. “The day you two stopped fighting what you felt for each other and accepted it.”

Damon’s face went red, and I couldn’t help a little laugh. Sometimes I thought he still wasn’t there quite yet, though it had gotten better over the last months. I squeezed his hand and leaned in to him. “That access road up there will take us to some shelter. We can hole up there until dark.”

I caught Damon’s smirk and knew he’d realized exactly where we were going. We’d passed some time there one rainy night, leaving me with some great memories. Which was good since he’d taken to avoiding me after that night.

Where are they going? Will they be safe? What’s going to happen next?

And I posted the final chapter of Dance with the Devil yesterday. So you can go check that out if you’d like. Either next week or the one after, I’ll be putting up the next story. Just need to get a cover figured out.

Stream of Consciousness Saturday: “Limb”

“I’m going to go out on a limb and say you’re upset.”

Jonas didn’t respond just tried to push the weight away from his body once more. Four years ago this weight would have been nothing. And now, well, now everything was different.

And he hated it.

“Last time you said you were going to be visiting your family. How’d that go?”

He really didn’t want to talk about that. So, he concentrated on the exercise instead. His leg was trembling, though. “Two more,” the man beside him said. “Then, you’ll be done.”

And Jonas thought he got the hint because he didn’t say another word as he finally finished the exercises. The man helped him sit up then handed him a towel to wipe the sweat away from his face.

“You want to talk about it now?”

Jonas glared at him. Apparently he hadn’t gotten the point. “Look,” the man said, “I know I’m just the physical therapist, and you have someone else you’re talking to. Doesn’t mean you can’t say things to me. There is a connection between mind and body. You’ve got to heal both of them.”

Great. Yet another reminder he was a different person now. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Yeah, I kind of figured that. Still, think you might need to. Your folks act badly?”

Jonas shook his head. “It’s only my mom. Any my brother and two sisters. They were all fine. My brother, Toby, is already coming up with options for me if I can’t go back.” Jonas caught the shimmer of pity in the man’s eyes. Yeah, he knew, but he didn’t want to admit it to himself yet.

“So what happened then?”

Jonas realized the man wasn’t just going to give it up. He dropped his head into his hands. “Saw my ex-boyfriend.” The words felt like they were ripped out of him. “It’s been almost five years.”

“What did he do?”

“Nothing,” Jonas said. “He walked away. He saw this–” he gestured to one side of his face– “and he just walked away. He always just walks away.” He’d barely realized he was crying until the other man put an arm around his shoulders. He hadn’t cried when Isaac first broke up with him. Or when he woke up in the hospital. Or through these weeks of physical therapy, no matter how much it hurt. But this, Isaac not even being able to look at his face, broke him down.

It had made him feel exactly what everyone was trying to convince him he wasn’t. Broken.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Today’s Stream of Consciousness Saturday prompt was to use limb any way we want. And once again a line of dialogue popped into my head. And I took it from there. This will happen at the beginning of Jonas & Isaac’s story(which I don’t even have plotted, though I did jot some notes down for it). Going to have to figure out exactly why Isaac walked away and what will get him to walk back. 🙂

Fiction Friday: Dance with the Devil – Chapter 10

This is the final chapter of Dance with the Devil. I should get the next story polished up next week, and be able to start posting it either then or the following week(once I get a cover figured out for it). But, for now, here’s the beginning of the end of Dance with the Devil:

I woke to Hawk’s bare chest right in front of me. I traced the Marine tattoo covering one side of it. I had a similar one on my arm. Hawk shivered, and his hand ran up my back. “We have to get up, Devil,” he said, and I heard the regret in his voice.

I already was. Unfortunately there wasn’t time for that this morning. I still pressed my mouth to his chest, but he hauled me up so our lips met. “Later,” he promised, “when this is over.”

I rolled away from him and found the clothes I’d stripped off the night before. “I’ll meet you downstairs,” I told him. His eyes were hot on me, even as I headed for the door. We had to get the job done, to keep the club and everything we stood for safe, but when that was taken care of, I’d be right back here with Hawk, and we could figure out where this would go.

As long as we both made it back. That was something I couldn’t bear to even think about. I pushed it away as I headed back to my room to get ready for this mission.

I was downstairs fifteen minutes later, just behind Hawk. I did not mind taking that position. I saw the slight bulge of one gun at his back, right at the bottom of his vest. I knew he’d carry another in the inside pocket of his vest. We all did that. Except Trace if he could help it.

I was pretty sure that was only one reason Icarus planned to leave him here to protect the ladies. Not that most of them couldn’t take care of themselves. I didn’t dare even insinuate that. But, I knew Icarus’ Cassie couldn’t. Birdie could protect herself, but she’d been abducted once before. Icarus wouldn’t want to take the chance it would happen again.

I rested my hand on his back right outside of the dining room. He glanced back over his shoulder and smiled at me. That look held a whole lot of promise for later. I wasn’t sure how to act now.

Hawk took care of that as we grabbed plates from the side table. He took my hand and pulled me in for a quick kiss. It was as simple as that.

And you can read the rest of the chapter here. I hope you’ve enjoyed it.

Writing Wednesday: No Internet

It’s been an odd week for me. Mostly because since I woke up Monday morning, we’ve had no internet. Kept hoping it would come back on. Even reset the modem a couple times. Nothing. Tuesday, I ended up using my phone as a hotspot just so I could get on and do a few things. But, our cell signal out here isn’t that great and I really didn’t want to use up all our data in one day(we’ve got a good bit rolled over, so it shouldn’t be a problem, but still). *Turning it on again long enough to post this* And I broke down and called Verizon. Went through their troubleshooting list, nothing worked. So they’re sending someone out here this morning to hopefully fix the problem. *fingers crossed* I’ll have my internet back today.

For now, since it is Wednesday, it’s time for another WiPPet!! Today I’m working on Still Burning, so I’ll share more from that today. I have 8 paragraphs(2+6 for the day) from the last scene I wrote. Jess & Austin have had this off & on relationship(more friends with benefits situation than actually dating) for a while, and he wants it to be more on. They tried dating, but she just keeps pushing him away, and he really wants to know why.

Austin knew he probably shouldn’t have said that. Especially not that last part. He shouldn’t let her see how much this was tearing him apart. Give her an entry point to hurt him even more.
He shook himself at that thought. She was not a fire, spreading through his walls. Moving along any crack she could find in his defenses. She was a woman. One he liked very much.
It didn’t matter what else she did, he still wanted her.
It was probably toxic to live like this, letting her in only to have her push him out again. Over and over, until he was sure he was going to break apart. But, he couldn’t seem to give her up anyway.
“I’m not trying to hurt you,” she finally said, her voice low. “That’s why I told you this wasn’t going to work. Because it’s the last thing I want to do.”
“Then, why do you keep walking away?”
“Because I’m not right for you. How many ways do I have to show you before you actually believe it?”
“A million,” he said, knowing the words came out harsh, even though it wasn’t the way he’d meant them. But, it felt like his throat had closed around them. “Because it’s not true. Jess, it isn’t true. You are the only one I want. How can you not be right for me?”

You can check out the other WiPPets here.

And now, for my progress so far this week:

Writing:

  • Heart of Christmas – 10000 words – 9915/10000 words, 2257 this week
    • No, it was definitely better to pull away now. He’d have to make her see this was for the best. Somehow.
  • Still Burning – 10000 words – 7727/10000 words,
  • Whatever It Takes – 10000 words – 7427/10000 words,
  • High on Loving You – 10000 words – 9053/10000 words,
  • By the Gun – 10000 words – 10092/10000 words, 1640 this week
    • Rosalyn sighed and shook her head then started up toward the house. “What?” Carlos yelled after her. “What does that mean?” *Ahh, siblings. 😉
  • Side Projects – 10000 words – 9526/10000 words, 1725 this week
    • Jacob & Matthew – 175 words – The boy frowned at that. As if he was thinking it over. Then, he asked, “Are you going to go away again?” *Matthew didn’t expect to be sentimental over the little brother he barely knows. And my goal on this one is met for the month.
    • Mike & Fadil – 271 words – Mike couldn’t help it, he laughed too. Then, he ran a hand over his hair. “I am sorry. I did not mean to be a bear.” *that’s not quite how Fadil would describe you, Mike. 😉

Editing:

  • Stained Blood – Beta edits – Chapter 1/26, 0 this month
  • Flames of Renewal – CP edits
  • In the Moonlight – Read Through & Revise – Read through Chapter 32/32.
  • Hang On – Polish & Submit – 50/50 polished. Submitted.
  • Staring at the Sun – Read Through, Revise, Polish, & Post to Wattpad – Read through Chapter 10/10.

Reading:

  • Listen: 5 books – 6/5, 1  this week
    • The Delphi Effect(Rysa Walker) – Started this Tuesday afternoon. Finished this Sunday morning. Really enjoyed it, but the next book doesn’t come out until October! Patience is not one of my virtues when it comes to books. 😉
    • A Merciful Death(Kendra Elliot) – Started this Sunday morning. On Chapter 24/42
  • Read: 30 books – 25/30, 3 this week
    • The Three Brooches(Katherine Lowry Logan) – Started this Saturday morning. At 42%
    • The Shadow Hour(Melissa Grey) – Started this Saturday morning. Finished it Sunday night. Really enjoyed this. And the final book in the trilogy came out like 2 weeks ago! Good timing(even though I won’t get it yet, b/c the kindle version is $10.99!)
    • The Magpie Lord(K.J. Charles) – Read this Monday. Really enjoyed it.
    • The Viper(Monica McCarty) – Started this Monday evening. Finished this Tuesday night. Really enjoyed it.

Sunday Summary: Reunion Time

I had a pretty good week. Okay, really good. And I met my Camp NaNo goal on Friday! Obviously I’ll keep writing through the rest of the month. And next. And the one after that. 😉

Yesterday we had our family reunion with my husband’s family. It was at an amusement park down in Altoona. We weren’t too sure if we were going to go, it’s a three hour drive for us and it was supposed to rain. We did end up going, though. And it did rain. Pretty hard at one point.

Our “lovely” view

Thankfully we were under a pavilion at least. We ate, played some board games(and I wrote a little bit in a notebook), and when it finally cleared up, we rode bumper cars and since we had a few extra tickets, the kids each went on another ride.

Driving from the backseat like usual

When we finally left, we went up through Clarion, which is where I went to college. So, we decided to stop at the Chinese restaurant we used to go to every time my husband came down to visit me. And then I got this fortune:

Well, that’s a little awkward. 😉

We stopped to get groceries on the way home. It was late, though, and the kids had already fallen asleep in the truck so my husband stayed in the truck with them while I went in to get the groceries. I also figured I’d grab birthday presents for the girl since she wasn’t with me. Her party’s in 2 weeks, so it’s good to not have to do it at the last minute.

Writing:

  • Heart of Christmas – 10000 words – 7658/10000 words, 2118 this week
    • Now, he finally got why Declan was telling him all this. “I don’t plan to leave her,” he told the other man. If anything, she’d figure out he wasn’t good enough, and leave him. And she’d probably be smart to do it.
  • Still Burning – 10000 words – 7727/10000 words, 2506 this week
    • It was probably toxic to live like this, letting her in only to have her push him out again. Over and over, until he was sure he was going to break apart. But, he couldn’t seem to give her up anyway.
  • Whatever It Takes – 10000 words – 7427/10000 words, 2194 this week
    • It was the anger that struck her the hardest, though. Alexa had not mentioned that. And it nearly overshadowed how attractive Carisa found her.
      Nearly.
  • High on Loving You – 10000 words – 9053/10000 words, 3808 this week(some of these were taken from Story a Day/Stream of Consciousness Saturday pieces)
    • That was only a few steps better than calling her “father”. She and Candace used to get along pretty well. At least as well as she’d ever known sisters to get along, especially with the four years between them. But, since she’d moved to California with Bill, there’d been too much between them and all their conversations quickly descended into spats and old arguments.
  • By the Gun – 10000 words – 8452/10000 words, 3306 this week – the first draft(of part 1) would be finished, but I decided to go back and stick in more scenes from other characters'(Luke’s kids who will continue on in the next 2 parts) POV. So now I have another 13 scenes to add in.
    • He picked up the other gun and cradled it in his hands. He would wear these from this day on and make sure they were what ended that cruel man once and for all.
  • Side Projects – 10000 words – 7801/10000 words, 2561 this week
    • Midas’ Daughter – 242 words – “Sweet dreams, princess,” he murmured. “We’ll figure everything out when you wake.” *This is finished! At least this draft. I’ll revise and find some readers for it then decide what to do.
    • Patrick & Sarah – 185 words – Patrick was nothing like any of them. But, she couldn’t help wondering if he might be the most dangerous of them all.
    • Tavin & Haiwee – 215 words – “Stop thrashing,” a deep voice said near his ear. “We are trying to help, but if you hurt one of us, we might stop. And then Haiwee would be very upset with me.”
    • Roman – 367 words – Roman winced a little. That kind of blind loyalty could be dangerous. Especially in a situation like this. But, he had to do something.
    • Dougal & Shae – 225 words – From behind her, she thought she heard a soft snort. She had to fight to keep her own lips from curving. She wasn’t about to be charmed by this guy. She refused to be.
    • Jacob & Matthew – 260 words – “Do not bother your father. He has more important work to do than talk to you.” *No wonder Matthew and his stepmother don’t get along.
    • Mike & Fadil – 211 words – Mike couldn’t stop staring at him, though, and slowly the man’s smile slipped. Mike forced his gaze away. “Sorry.”
    • Preggers – 154 words – “You really think you should take a near stranger to a family dinner?”
    • Hawk – 257 words – Then, that means someone else wants me dead. I don’t think that’s comforting at all.”
    • Sean & Braeden – 230 words – Tomorrow everything would be normal again. *Sure, Sean, keep telling yourself that.
    • Jared’s Stepfather – 215 words – “Sure, man,” Jared said and nodded at Brent who stood behind his brother’s shoulder. He’d likely see him before he saw Carlos again.

Editing:

  • Stained Blood – Beta edits – Chapter 1/26, 0 this month
  • Flames of Renewal – CP edits
  • In the Moonlight – Read Through & Revise – Read through Chapter 26/32.
  • Hang On – Polish & Submit – 50/50 polished. Submitted Friday morning.

Reading:

  • Listen: 5 books – 5/5, 1 this week
    • Honestly Ben(Bill Konigsberg) – Started this Saturday morning. Finished this Tuesday morning. Really enjoyed it.
    • The Delphi Effect(Rysa Walker) – Started this Tuesday afternoon. On Chapter 21/22. I’ve only got about 20 minutes of this left at time of posting.
  • Read: 30 books – 22/30, 4 this week
    • The Three Brooches(Katherine Lowry Logan) – Started this Saturday morning. At 28%
    • No Good Duke Goes Unpunished(Sarah MacLean) – Started this Monday morning. Finished this Tuesday evening. Really enjoyed it.
    • Wayfarer(Alexandra Bracken) – Started this Tuesday evening. Finished it Wednesday night. Really really enjoyed it.
    • Hard Wired(Megan Erickson & Santino Hassell) – Started this Wednesday night. Finished it Thursday night. Loved it.
    • Infamous(Suzanne Brockmann) – Started this Thursday night. Finished it Friday night. It was really good. Basically took the whole “every villain is the hero of his own story” thing quite literally. Finding out the legend of an Old West hero was the complete opposite of what happened.
    • The Shadow Hour(Melissa Grey) – Started this Saturday morning. At 42%

Stream of Consciousness Saturday: Sealing/ceiling

Isaac lay on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. This night certainly had not turned out the way he’d planned. Not even close.

There was a soft knock on his door and he rubbed his arm over his eyes, hoping it came away dry. It didn’t. Still, he said, “You can come in.” And damn it, even his voice gave everything away.

His foster mother stepped into the room. “What’s going on, Isaac?” she asked as she sat on the side of the bed. “We expected you to be at the dance longer. Did you and Jonas have a fight?”

He’d laugh, but that would probably make him start crying again. Him and Jonas fighting? It was almost unbelievable. And not quite what you’d call what happened tonight. When he didn’t respond, Cristine put a gentle hand on his shoulder. “What happened?”

“Did you know?” he asked. Maybe he was the only dumbass who hadn’t figured out something was up with his boyfriend.

“Know what, Isaac?” He could hear the worry in her voice and knew he’d actually have to say it.

“That Jonas was enlisting in the Army. After graduation, he’ll be leaving for basic training.” He didn’t even know when exactly. He hadn’t stuck around to let Jonas give him the details. “Did you know?”

“No, but that’s great.” He stared at her, shocked she said that. “Isn’t it?”

He pushed himself up and wrapped his arms around his legs. “How can it be great? He’s leaving. He could be hurt or k-killed.” There went his voice, cracking again. “He could-”

“What?” she asked when he stopped. She’d always been good at getting more out of him than he’d planned to say.

“He could turn into my dad. He was in the Army, too. Did you know that?”

“We did. But, that’s not what turned him into the monster you grew up with. You know that, right?”

“Yeah,” he choked out. “But, it just-”

She put her arm around him. “Your fears don’t have to make sense, Isaac. But, you shouldn’t let them keep you from that boy you love so much. His dad and brother both served, too. And he’s been forever trying to live up to them.”

Isaac hadn’t thought of that as part of Jonas’ reasoning. And now he wanted to shout at him that it wasn’t necessary. That he loved him just as he was. He didn’t want him to be someone else. “I can’t do it,” he said “I just can’t.”

“Okay,” Cristine said. “I know it hurts now, but you’ll figure it out.”

He hoped she was right. because this, it was almost more than he could take. But, he’d learned early to start sealing his pain away. That’s what he’d have to do now, too.

~~~~~~

Ha! I didn’t think I’d get both words in there for this week’s Stream of Consciousness Saturday. This takes place right after my ‘ick’ piece from 2 weeks ago. I do have plans for Jonas and Isaac…eventually. I have a couple stories in the series to get through before that, though.

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