Home of a mother, wife, writer

After the last productive week, this week feels like an utter fail. I probably shouldn’t think that. I have been getting things done. Monday really wasn’t too bad, except I didn’t get to the revisions I’d planned on. So I moved that goal to first thing Tuesday morning. And then, Tuesday morning I…just couldn’t focus. What I should have done was set the revisions aside and worked on one of my other projects. Instead, I just tried to push on. And made only a little progress. I did eventually get through Monday’s planned revisions, but only wrote about 400 words on Flames of Restoration, nothing on Stained Blood, and didn’t even start Tuesday’s revisions. So, yeah, I’m behind right now.

I also made a decision about my Flames series. While writing my M & N posts for the A-Z challenge, I realized these are the characters that talk to me the most/loudest, so they should be my first priority. This doesn’t mean I won’t work on my other series/stories, but they will get first priority. I think I’ll keep doing what I am right now with splitting the day’s word count between 2 projects. But whatever Flames story I’m writing(or the spin-off which I’m plotting now…with Nolan’s brother) will get the higher split of those words. This may change if any other characters start talking louder, but for right now that’s what I’m going to do.

And now, for another snippet from Flames of Recompense. Last week, we left Callum & Megan trying to figure out where they stood with each other. This week’s is during the same day but quite a bit later. 19 paragraphs of mostly dialogue(4+15).

“Hey, Meg,” he called as he neared the kitchen. “Have you seen-”
His words cut off when he realized there’d been another voice in the kitchen. It was too late to stop his forward motion, though. Megan’s mother’s head whipped around, and he felt color flood his face before he jumped back into the hallway. His hands came up to grip the back of his head, and he very nearly banged his head on the wall. “Fuck, fuck, fuck,” he muttered.
Then, Megan was stepping out, a soft smile on her face. “Relax,” she murmured and handed a bundle of clothes to him. “It’s okay.”
“Your mother just saw me naked,” he said through gritted teeth. “She already hates me. This certainly isn’t going to help.”
“She doesn’t hate you,” Megan said, but he saw the way she worried at her lip.
“What’s she doing here anyway? Did she bring Kaelin home?”
Megan shook her head. “She convinced Dad to take her to the park before they came home. Mom wanted to talk to me.”
He noticed the way Megan wouldn’t look directly at him. “About me?”
She nodded then put a hand on his chest. “It’s fine. Go get dressed, and we’ll deal with this.”
But, first, he leaned forward and pressed his lips to her cheek. “Meg.”
“Just go get dressed,” she said softly before he could decide what else to say. “It’s okay.”
He headed back toward the bedroom, but stopped when he heard the raised voices from the kitchen.
Her mom’s “I can’t believe you’d do this.”
“Mom, stop,” Megan replied.
“Seriously, he’s nothing but-”
“Stop,” Megan said, harsher this time. “He’s nothing but Kaelin’s father.” His stomach clenched at that. Is that seriously all she thought of him. Even after…His thoughts trailed off as she continued. “He’s nothing but the first man I ever loved. He’s nothing but the one man I have never been able to stop thinking about. He’s nothing but a good man who deserves a second chance. I don’t see why you won’t let him have that.”
He stayed where he was for another moment and was just about to give up listening and go on to the bedroom, when he heard her mother say, “I just don’t want to see you hurt again. I saw how shattered you were the last time he chose drugs over you. I don’t want to see it happen again. And you know it will.”
He didn’t wait to hear Megan’s response to that. It was obvious she thought he’d fall again. Maybe everyone thought it. He didn’t know what else to do to prove to them he was serious about this. He closed the bedroom door behind him and leaned back against it, closing his eyes. He wanted this with Megan, but he didn’t know how long he could take her not trusting him. She’d said he was the first man she’d really loved and she hadn’t stopped thinking about him. But, that didn’t mean she still loved him. Not the way he still loved her.
“It doesn’t matter,” he muttered. She didn’t have to love him. As long as she didn’t try to keep Kaelin from him again.

So, will Callum ever be able to prove himself? Will her mother ever accept him(or even tolerate him)? Will Megan trust him again? Stay tuned!

And for the RoW80 update:

  • Stained Blood – Add ~10k to this(total around 35k) – wrote 2136 on this on Monday. Going to adjust this goal to ~5k for this week. So, final count for the week will be 30k.
  • Flames of Restoration – Add ~10k to this(total around 15k) –  I’ve written 3751 so far this week. If I can get today’s words in too, I’ll be back on track.
  • Flames of Renewal – Revise through Chapter 10 – I added a prologue & got through 2 chapters. Adding at least 1 new scene to Chapter 3 now.
  • Flames Volunteer Spin-off – Brainstorm – I’ve got mind maps for main characters(in general) and the protagonist(more involved) done. On track with this one.
  • Into the Sun: Add at least 250 words to this. – not yet. If I work on it, it will be over the weekend. –
  • Just Add Moonlight: a flash story for the TGNA anthology. We’ll see how this goes. – same as above
  • Blog: K-P posts – I have through N written and scheduled. Hoping to get O & P done today or tomorrow.
  • Read: Finish Island of Glass(Ruth Nestvold), A Hero for Holly(Kristy K James), Hard As It Gets(Laura Kaye), Catch Me When I Fall(Vicki Leigh), Rescue My Heart(Jill Shalvis), & Sunlounger 2(various authors) – I enjoyed all of the ones I’ve finished so far. Hoping to start Catch Me When I Fall sometime today.
  • Knit: Simple Cable Scarf – Finish Cable pattern 3 & 2(for the second time). – almost finished with repeating pattern 3. I should be able to do that today, and I’ll be more than half done with the scarf.


Comments on: "Writing Wednesday: Losing Focus" (23)

  1. Awkward snippet. I like it. lol

  2. I love the titles you’ve come up with. Sounds like some very complicated relationships. Good job!

  3. Pft. I’ve been having that kind of week too. Just keep on keeping on, and let those loud characters do the work! 😉

    • I think I’m back on track now. At least I got caught back up with my writing goals yesterday. And these characters…yeah, sometimes it feels like they’re dragging me along, and I’m just copying down their story.

  4. You. Are. KILLING ME, Fallon!!!! *crosses arms over chest and looks petulant* Stop it.

    Or don’t. 😛 That’s a yucky situation. The problem with any kind of addiction is that, really, you’re not trustworthy anymore. 😦 (Speaking as someone who worked in a psych hospital.) At least, not the way most people want to define trust. You’re perfectly trustworthy if you’re sticking to all your accountability systems, but a lot of people think trust = blind trust, which is just not so. I hope Callum and Megan can come to an understanding.

    • Nope, definitely not going to stop it. 😀

      And thanks for your thoughts on this. I think there may always be some measure of distrust/wariness on Megan’s part, but it will get better.

  5. I’m rooting for peaceful coexistence. I get Megan’s position, but also hurt for Callum – to feel that there’s no way to not be seen as his past…and to know that his newfound daughter might be the price…

    Of course, if he can deal with this stress without backsliding, that has to say something about his level of commitment.

    I find that I definitely have creative ebbs and surges – even through challenge months. If I do other things (today, time cleaning the kids’ rooms, and giving my 13 year old son a tutorial on the operating systems of my car, because he “wants to know everything I can about it before I take my road test”. He likes to be prepared (an I learned a few things about the car that I didn’t know!).

    When I stress out about it, I tend to take longer to get back to a more typical flow. I think the shifting of focus might really help you. =)

    • peaceful may be asking a bit much of her mother right now. Although I may share a snippet with her father next week. 🙂 And she’ll definitely see how committed he is. Thought that doesn’t mean he won’t struggle with it.

      I think if I wouldn’t have tried to push through and just shifted to working on something else, it wouldn’t have been as bad. I did end up going for a walk Tuesday, and that seemed to help clear things up a bit. And I did catch up yesterday, so hopefully I can stay on track now.

      • I know what you mean about the pushing through. I’m getting better at recognizing the feeling and the resistance when I need to shift, but I still waste some energy before I get to that place.

        Right now, I’m wrapping up a nearly two-day hiatus from Transitions, because I need to write Corinne’s Plot Point 3 next, and Barry’s shifted considerably from my plot, thereby changing what hers needs to do significantly. I could have pushed through, I suppose, and I almost did.

        But, starting last evening, bits and pieces of the new scene have been coming to me, and I feel like rushing them isn’t going to be nearly as good as waiting a bit longer…another few hours, at the most, because I can feel the urge to write this scene starting to gain momentum (I read what I had in the outline, and the end of the preceding scene, just before I went to sleep, so my brain played with ideas in my dreams…).

        In the meantime, answering comments, drafting A-Z posts, and wrapping up plotting for Generations, the next Kifo Island book are keeping me occupied. That, and hometending.

        I took a walk Tuesday, too. It was a perfect day for it!

        I believe commitment shows best when it is a struggle. And I really like Callum.

      • I’ve gotten 3 walks in so far this week. Hoping for another 1 today. The weather’s been great(although it was very windy on yesterday’s walk).
        I’m glad you like Callum. I wasn’t sure I would when I first wrote him into the first book. He’s grown on me(and grown up a bit) since then.

  6. Megan’s mother got an eyeful! LOL Oh my. That seriously is one of my biggest fears — walking naked into a room where someone other than the hubs is standing. I would die. I’m glad Callum got to hear more of what Megan said, so perhaps he has a little hope. But lost trust is such a hard thing to repair.

    • yeah, that would be embarrassing. We don’t usually have too many people just stop by, so I don’t think too much about it.

      It is, and it will take some time. They’re working their way toward it though.

  7. I could totally feel Callum’s emotions there; And Megan’s. I just love these two! And as for losing focus–it’s okay to let your mind breath a bit and not cross off everything on your lists. Don’t look at them as a fail; look at them as an adventure, instead. Who knows what inspiration/ideas/etc you might have in those quiet, non-working moments? 😀

    • Thanks. I’m pretty fond of them, too. 🙂

      And I was able to get back on track. Just needed to break Nolan’s heart a little in the process 😉

  8. This sort of happened to me once. I was stopping off at the farm we were hiring to provide the horsedrawn carriage for our wedding, and knocking on the front door… I got an eyeful, because only the glass door was closed and our driver had been in the bathroom, away from his bathrobe.

    An awkward place… but definitely a telling scene.

  9. I love complications in relationships, and it seems like Megan and Callum have a lot!! Can’t wait to see how it all unravels.

  10. Stubbornly sticking to a project can sometimes be good and sometimes bad. You never know until you’re in too deep. Though, when that happens to me I usually learn a lesson (which on occasion I might forget later on and have to relearn). Seems that it had that kind of effect on you. I hope it doesn’t interfere with your goals/schedule too much. 🙂

    • It should be okay. I won’t finish Stained Blood like I’d planned to this month, but I’ll finish Flames of Restoration before its deadline(at this rate, probably before I’d even planned to start it). It’ll even out.

  11. Oh, boy. Yeah, that would be awkward and humiliating for Callum on all counts. I get where they’re coming from—it would be hard to trust him again. But I see his perspective too. It’s hard to feel like you always have to prove yourself. I hope they can meet in the middle somewhere.

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